Thanks Dad!

Dear Dad:

Thank you for not calling me an ingrate when I was growing up. Thank you for letting my severe ingratitude not smack me in the face until today. When I was cleaning up the overflowed toilet and plunging to save the water reserves I began to recognize how much you did for us. All those times you worked hours and hours on projects around the house--I had no idea what you were doing, but I knew that if I ever had any household problems I could call you in a wink and you'd be there to help me.

Take today for example, R dutifully flushed the toilet and a few minutes later began to call for help to which I walked--will I ever learn--and found an inch of water on the floor (sorry downstairs neighbor). The toilet would not be consoled and wept literally gallons. It wasn't until I turned the knob of waterlessness that the toilet began to stop.

It was then I phoned you--oddly enough I thought I needed to go through my list of "probably should call first people"--but I knew you were the one that would have the solution on the spot.

I think that toilet of mine really holds a grudge. Seriously I think it decided it did not like us from the minute we walked in the house because I am positive I have had to call you at least once every two weeks to ask for advice on what to do. Maybe I am biased but I think it is snobby. After all--it is a 1940's antique, custom built toilet without the $166 toilet lid--maybe that's what it's mad about. Not that I am complaining because it normally does it's job. But I think it gets disgruntled at the quick flushes (that would work on any normal toilet). No, this one demands the actual 10 second flush--and yes, you HAVE to count.

Thank you for giving me correct instructions on plunging. I had no idea but plumbing is really an art. The way one plunges is an art too. I found out from Brent, my bro, the proper way to plunge. You stick it in their at an angle to relieve air and then you do the quick swashes. . . .Sw, sw, sw, sw, sw (abbreviated form of course that would go on for about two pages scrolling and four pages on paper--but to save megapixels and paper in the future I am truncating it). It kind of sounds like a squirrels resting heart rate--unless you really get into it--then it is faster. It is really a pretty good work out.

Forgive me please, for being an absolute ingrate. I didn't realize all that you do. You and Mom make the best team! I hope I can be just like both of you. Thank you for all you did and all you do. :)

Love always,
M

P.S. For those reading, please forgive any potty-mouth language. I have no excuse--I am not yellow, square, and wear brown pants and have starfish for friends. We do not condone such talk in my house.